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Monday, 31 May 2010

Safe New World

Industry insiders believe Apple is developing a new computing device that will be completely unable to browse traditional websites. The device will instead allow users the significantly more fulfilling experience of viewing a set of specially designed iSites, which will be of a superior quality to normal websites, in every way that matters, according to the recently compiled Appleness Constitution, that is. The move is being read as an exploratory measure in establishing the level of participation that might be expected for the reported upcoming development of the iSland, a tropical paradise nation to which selected consumers will be able, at a small cost, to emigrate. The state is expected to comprise a benevolent dictatorship of gadgets, and citizens will be given free cosmetic surgery on arrival to make them appear quirkily creative while approachable, and of course shit-staggeringly gorgeous.

Sunday, 16 May 2010

Five essential pathTrap protocol plug-ins for the TeeTee3

Following last month's appallingly successful run down of those must-hack Yank-drop extensions, we've decided to let you in on our top picks for the Big Boy Collective's upcoming developmentalist protocol tracking tools.
1. Lice Mat pinholdings
2. Wanx
3. Fixup temp by Darn Satchelson
4. TipMaster II (with optional Torque Combs)
5. The Moon
But hey, what the fuck would we know? We just code ourselves to within an inch of our lives on a daily basis...