Small World

A new type of proton has been discovered which can heal itself. The particle has been nicknamed Poncho after the infamous Martina Martini's childhood pet dog. Apparently she was really into subatomic particles, and eggs of course.

Talk to the Hand

Nanavivovavum releases Pocket Feeling Socket Bouncing Tickle Chip Proton Pouch that'll comb your hair! And not before time..

Too Much Information

Dr Light O'Shaughnessy of the ScuM Insitute has hit the headlines again with his latest Being Processing Protocol. The guys at Beast Central have already christened it JoySlaughter...

Fly Me To The Mean

BioMental Ltd want to make pigs fly, in EtherSpace that is. The latest 'leaked' footage of the notorious development project also contains what appear to be transexual ants carrying out what can only be described as libidinous acts. Rumour has it the pigs are going to be starring in an upcoming series of ads for a well-known brand of adhesive...

What Fresh Hell is This?

Patrick Shoulder of LifeLyk Xperiences Ltd is claiming to have perfected the experience of going outdoors, all from within the comfort of your own bedsit. OutdoorsIn is the Variegated Reality program that affords you all* the benefits of the open air but without the annoying children, flies and expectations that, let's face it, we all dread. Never again have your morning walk tainted by the worry that someone you spoke to briefly may have thought that you meant something different to what you in fact did.
*ok, none then